Stop pretending that your beautiful.
Stop pretending that anyone would ever want you.
Stop pretending that you aren't going off the wall.
Stop pretending that this isn't true.

Take your dreams and put them in a shoe box.
Save them for a rainy day.
Don't spend them all in one place or you'll end up
like me today...

Don't Cry. Cause crying takes you back a step.
Til your stuttering and you fall.
You fall on you face. With blood spilling
all over the place.

 Whisper goodbye to your lover.
Run to your room, paint it red and never come out.


Don't hope. Cause hoping blinds you from the truth.
Saying oh he'll come around. When sweetie, he won't.
He'll go out with another girl.

Take your dreams and shove them in the closet.
Save them for a rainy day.
Don't spend them all in one place or you'll end
up like me today.

(back when I felt unwanted by my guy friend that I had a crush on.)

Giving Up

thanks for giving up on me.
i'll just add you to the checklist
of my screwed up life.
I can see that I did this to myself.
So please.
Dont give up when you said
we'd never talk again.
It just makes it easier
on my heart.
Now it finally has nothing
to keep it beating.
I could die right now
and nobody would REALLY care.
You already killed my mind
and heart unintentionally.
My mind cause I'll never stop thinking
of you, even after last night.
And of course my heart
cause i know it will never happen.
Every time her name passes through
your lips, my heart bleeds.
Its not fair.
I dont have control over anything anymore,
even my heart.

1 idea I originally had was to dress up like Ryan Ross and go as Panic At The Disco with Kira and some of my other friends.  I was thinking as dressing up like this. But it might be hard to find such unique clothes like Ryan's.

Kira should totally go out and buy a black sweatshirt and some like iron on letters and make her own Brendon sweatshirt.

Another idea was to dress up as a princess at a masquerade ball. Kira's sister came up with the idea and encouraged me to join her. I have been looking online for a costume and got a couple different dresses. They can be very expensive, but its soooo worth it.

   which one do you like better? 

and then the shoes:

arent they so Marie Antoinette? They also have them in a peeptoe.

So yeah. If you have any ideas for either being Ryan, the princess, or an idea of your own for me, please tell me.

oh! and does anyone know where to get fans and masks to go with my dress if I do end up going with that idea?

1. This is my favorite person in the world.  Ryan Ross ♥

2. Kira is like a sister to me.

3. I love Panic At The Disco.

4.  I like taking pictures of me being random.

5. I love listening to music.

6. My favorite movie is The Breakfast Club.

7.  I hate my name.    

8. I love polkadots and lightning bolts.  

9.  I like fashion but I would never in a million years be called trendy or anything.

10. Signal The Escape is a good local band. If you like music that hasnt really come out yet and isnt mainstream, check them out at www.myspace.com/signaltheescape

of him just cause hes with her.

its hard to see them together

your love and his love

but try.

when she breaks up with him

you'll be there.

he'll prob never be with you

but try.

never let go of him.